What Am I Even Doing?

Sometimes I feel like what am I even doing here? Not like “in the world” sense, but more in this writing sense. Honestly, I just feel like it’s something I need to keep around so I do. But, really, what am I doing?

I originally intended for this space to be things I learn from what I read. I read all of the time, but …. notes? I don’t take them. I highlight in my Kindle and move on. And that’s if I finish a book. (Wow, look at me telling the truth.) *Sigh* I do a lot of starting books and then maybe finish years later. I buy an e-book before I finish the previous one. I buy another before I start the last one. So how can I process when I don’t process?

At this point book buying is an addiction – a distraction – but I haven’t yet figured out the why. And is this something I really need to figure out? Beginnings can feel really amazing, but it’s some shit when you go through a honeymoon phase with yourself. I don’t even know what to make of it.

I am so quick to burn up one version of myself or my work for another, but where does it lead me? And better yet, does it need to lead me anywhere? Whatever it I feel I need, I’m sure it will come when I’m more aligned with whatever it is.

Until then, here’s my ramblings for whoever visits my site. Most likely Russian men looking to book escorts. 😂 But I’m not mad! Thank you for the traffic.